A Subtle Change

I don’t know if it’s the Valentines Day hoopla that made me realize this or what but lately I’ve been noticing a subtle change in the way people address my “situation in life” (to borrow a phrase from Jane Austen). I’m 28 years old and I’m finding that people are changing their wording from “when you get married and have children” or “if” to “if you want to” or “do you want to”? Like I’m choosing to not have a relationship or family. In a day and age where it’s quite acceptable for women to remain unmarried and childless, it is viewed as a choice.

I’m not offended by it. The same as I’m really not offended by the endless “are you married yet? Anyone special in your life?” Questions. Mostly I realize that people just care and want me to be happy. I do find it amusing that they seem to think that I am choosing to not be married though.

Yes I choose to not date just anyone and I definitely don’t sleep around but I wouldn’t say I’m choosing to be single any more than I’d “choose” to be IN a relationship. I mean it’s not like you can just go to the store and buy a husband or child. I’d like nothing more than to change my “situation” but I don’t feel that it’s up to me to decide when that happens. And until it does happen, I’ll continue to live my life the best way I know how, and I’ll watch to see how people react.

The Russians are Comi....HERE!

Last Wednesday I stopped by one of our local rinks to watch the Russian Figure Skaters practicing. It's a popular place so I only was able to stay for 20 minutes. I watched Maria Mukhortova and Maxim Trankov. It definitely made it more interesting while watching the Pairs - Free Skating tonight! They finished seventh over all, but it was still fun to see them!

Other People's Normal

Funny the things that stick with you from childhood. Impressions of people. I remember in Grade 9 I was working on a French project with a girl I had known since primary school. We made plans to meet up after school to develop our project. I showed up at her place not long after school got out and, this may seem weird, I was caught totally off guard because she had changed into sweats and a t-shirt. "Comfy clothes" compared to what she had worn to school that day. For me, someone who was fashion challenged, and got dressed in the morning and stayed in the same clothes all day, that was a totally foriegn concept.

Now, after working in an office for ten years, I totally understand her. Most days, the first thing I do when I get home is strip out of my "work clothes". Sometimes into sweats and a t-shirt, sometimes just into more casual clothes. I rarely keep on what I was wearing that day though.

Even on the weekend it's not rare for me to change two or three times a day. Different events call for different clothes. I frequently stop at home just long enough to change my clothes or, if I'm prepared, I'll take a change of clothes with me. I'm far from being a fashion plate but I know what I like to wear, when. I often think of that girl when I'm changing after work. How shocked I was that she had changed, and now, how I wouldn't have it any other way!

Restless

Tonight I can't wait to move to Ontario. Church was cancelled in favour the AGM and I forgot about it till late this afternoon. I had "one of those days" at work and even though I got to see something interesting after work (I'll blog about that separately) I'm just feeling lost. I got home around 7 after stopping off at Mom and Dad's briefly and I still needed to eat. Despite the fact that I just spent $100 on groceries none of the food in my house inspired me. I called Mere but her phones off (I think she's at school). I feel like I want to do something spontaneous but it's raining and cold out. Not exactly conducive weather...and what would I do anyways? Know that saying "Familiarity breeds contempt?" That's exactly where I am right now. I'm sick of this town. Sick of knowing each and every restaurant and how long they're open. Sick of wanting to go for a drive but knowing exactly what every freaking street in this town looks like (well, not EVERY but you get the point). I couldn't get lost if I wanted to.

There are people I could call but everyone has their own problems and frankly I don't feel like talking to anyone. I can't go shopping (even though I was at Walmart earlier) because I'll just spend money I don't have to spend. I have stuff to do online (and despite the fact that I logged on to write this post) I really don't want to do it.

I just need something NEW. New places. New faces. Not the same old same old.

Sorry to be such a Debbie Downer. I don't really care though. Maybe it will be something different in this blog because I'm sure my readers get bored too :P

Olympic Torch Run Part 2

Well, part two for me at least. Even though I had witnessed the arrival of the torch on Sunday, I wanted to see it again. So Monday morning at 5am I drove to the next town over where the torch was starting it's trek for the day. It was dry and surprisingly warm and LOTS of people turned out.

The celebrations were spread out along First Avenue. I walked past the main stage as Carly Rae Jepsen was starting her set.
I was hoping to meet up with friends who were volunteering but I didn't end up finding them. Instead I hung out with some collegues of mine.




When the torch bearer finally came by, he was literally running so this is all I got for a photo. Oh well, at least I got to see it again :)

Wavelengths

So I'm sitting here at work filing and thinking "I should call Mom...but why. I don't have anything to say to her. Oh well." Thirty seconds later the phone rings.

"Heidi? It's Mom..."

Thankfully she had something to say, and I got to talk to my Mom. I love being on the same wavelength as her!

Olympic Torch Run

The Olympic torch arrived in my hometown this evening and I (and 20,000 others) were on hand to greet it. I actually saw it going down our main street while I was trying to drive to the festival site. I met up with my friend Mike and we walked up to the site together and Meredith met us there. I had tons of other friends around too. Some of which I saw, some I didn't (like my parents) although we did talk on the phone. There was stage entertainment up until the torch entered the stadium and then we watched in go around most of the track and up to the stage. There were lots of torch bearers around with their extinguished torches and they were all really awesome about letting us pose for pictures with them.

Once on stage the "cauldron" was lit and a bunch of politicians, including our Provincial Premier, Gordon Campbell gave speeches. Oh, and of course we sang O Canada.

Then there were dances by a local dance troupe, including dancing inukshuks. The were kind of cute...

To end the evening these two (he's from Nunavut, she's from New Brunswick...or maybe vice versa) they took the flame, and put it inside the little lantern she was carrying where it will stay over night. Then it's off to the rest of the lower mainland.

January 2010 12of12

Better late than never?

January 12, 2010 The "12 of 12" people always suggest putting your camera right by your bed so you start taking pictures first thing in the morning. This day, when my alarm when off, I grabbed my camera and took a picture of what I look like when I'm sleeping. Even though I was technically awake, it was only just.

The night before I had washed my hair. I brushed it out in the morning and before re-braiding it, I took a picture.
This day marked on year of being back at my old job, in my new position. How did I celebrate? By spending well over an hour in the non-ventilated server room on the phone with Telus and my video conference technician trying to fix some technical issues. I'm publishing this post on February 6th and it was this Thursday (the 4th) that these issues were finally, fully resolved. Uggh.
Because I was trapped in the server room, I took the time to organize it. The bucket shown here was FULL of cords. I took them out one by one, wrapped them up and divided them into drawers in this unit. Not the way I wanted to spend my morning but at least I achieved something useful.

After dealing with technicians all morning, I treated myself to Burger King for lunch. There is a location a few blocks from work that used to be a Burger King, then they became some other burger joint and recently they've had a "Burger King Coming Soon" sign up. It FINNALLY opened and this was my first visit. It was probably the worst BK food I've ever had (half the fries weren't done) but the staff was awesome. Very funny and engaging. I'll go back just to have them serve me.

While I ate I listened to Jane Austen's Pride & Prejudice on cd. It's our book club selection for the month. More on that in a bit.
After work I went and gave blood. Giving is always a crapshoot for me. I fail regularly for a variety of reasons. This time I was successful! And I got cookies...that's the best part of giving blood :D
So, back to book club. I mentioned in my last post that I had read a book about a club who read books and then did an activity based on the story. Well my friends Leah and Anj decided to form a book club that they have dubbed "Script to Screen" (S2S) the premise is that we will read a book and then watch the movie. Yes it limits us to books that have been turned into movies but there's TONS of those with more being made every year.

January 12th was our first meeting, an "orientation" of sorts. Everyone brought snacks to share. There were brownies with "movie tickets" that had quotes on them.
And tons of other yummy food.
Leah and Anj had a whole agenda worked out covering everything they thought would be important when you have a group of women getting together.

This was basically the same group that got together to watch Twilight and then go to see New Moon in November.
Leah hadn't seen the BBC version of Pride & Prejudice so that's what we selected for our first book. I'll put that in a separate post.

Leah and Anj went all out with decorating and staying in theme. Showing it all would go over 12 pictures but suffice to say, it was awesome. The last picture is one of the stacks of books they had as a centre piece on the table to get us in the mood :)

So that's my day. Better late than never and killing two birds with one stone because I got to talk about S2S in the same post!

Around the World in 80 Days

Last year I discovered a series of books by Laura Jensen Walker, called the Getaway Girls, well, I say series but I have only read two books. The third was just released this month. The premise of the books is that the girls read a book and then go on an adventure based on the story. The books are full of quotes and book recommendations and considering how much I love reading, they`re perfect for me.

One of the book suggestions was Around the World in 80 Days. I picked the book on cd up from the library a few days later and absolutley fell in love with the story. It`s smart and funny, very fast paced and even a love story. I`ve been raving about the book ever since.

A few weeks ago I heard that a local theatre group was doing the stage show. Mom and I made plans to go, and tonight was the night. It was fantastic. It is billed as a ``comedy adventure adapted by Mark Brown``. There are only five actors and each of them play many, many parts. They were all extremely talented and even though you knew it was the same actors, a few props, slight costume changes and an accent or two thrown in made you forget that it was a familiar face.

The stage show was just as enjoyable as the book had been. I recommend it just as highly as before I saw the show, actually, more so now :)

One Little Word

Lots of places suggest selecting one word as your word for the year. I am most familiar with the concept through Ali Edwards. This newsletter explains the concept.

“A single word can be a powerful thing. It can be the ripple in the pond that changes everything. It can be sharp and biting or rich and soft and slow.

Last fall in issue two of this newsletter I wrote about the power of words and gave my top ten tips for getting those words down when you are scrapbooking. Today I want to introduce you to the idea that a single word can be a catalyst for enriching your life as well as your scrapbook layouts”

I haven’t blogged about it before but for the last two years my word was “PEACE”. I gravitated towards songs that had that word in the lyrics and whenever I saw it somewhere or read a verse that contained it, a tangible peace would settle over me.

My song for 2009 was Jeremy Camp’s “Slow Down Time”. I included the lyrics at the end of this post: http://agent713.blogspot.com/2009/01/2008-year-that-was.html. The line that says “My only peace is waiting before You” really stuck with me all year.

My word for 2010 year is DREAM. I just realized as I am writing this entry that it coincides nicely with 2010 being the Olympic year. Lots of people have dreams of Olympic gold. My dreams are different and I feel like this year I am giving myself the permission to truly DREAM about the possibilities.

Many of my dreams are scheduled to come true this year. I mean how long have I been wanting to move to Ontario? This is the year that will happen. Even though I only quantified and verbalized the idea of going back to school recently, I am realizing that is a dream and it is a means to seeing another dream fulfilled, that is working in a field that I am truly passionate about. Maybe some year “passion” will be my word. For now, I am focusing on DREAMing about the possibilities in life.

I’ve only heard the song a few times but this is the front runner for song of the year for 2010 for me: Jessie Farrel’s “Burn So Bright”

If you’re waiting for the perfect time
To try something you’ve never tried
Time will pass you by and you won’t do it
Save nothing for a rainy day, you’ll blink and it will be too late
Why not start right now and just get to it?
Shut up the voice inside your head that says “stay in the shadows”

Burn so bright that the dream you have inside lights up the night
Burn so bright that the angels have to cover up their eyes
Dare to be bold, dare to be great
Leave a little love all over the place
It’s your life, burn so bright

Why talk why you can sing out loud?
Why hide when you can draw a crowd?
You deserve a future with no limits
Take baby steps until you’re done
Don’t miss out on all the fun
Put a memory in every minute
With every excuse you come up with
You’ll miss a door that opens

Burn so bright that the dream you have inside lights up the night
Burn so bright that the angels have to cover up their eyes
Dare to be bold, dare to be great
Leave a little love all over the place
It’s your life, burn so bright

Turn up that voice inside your head that says “you’re heard for a reason”

Burn so bright that the dream you have inside lights up the night
Burn so bright that the angels have to cover up their eyes
Dare to be bold, dare to be great
Leave a little love all over the place
It’s your life, burn so bright

I do feel that I’ve been “living in the shadows” and I’m excited to start “burning so bright”.

I also love the line “Put a memory in every minute”. Dierks has a song called “Every Mile a Memory” which I’ve always loved and (CREEPY!!! It just came on the radio!!!) but the idea of putting a memory in EVERY moment, is even more powerful. It implies that every small part of life should be memorable and I love that.

So there, this a freakishly long entry but now I’ve got it out there.

Now I can keep DREAMing.

1,000 Posts

I’ve been dancing around this particular post for a couple of months now. In December I posted that I was celebrating my 4th Anniversary of this blog.

Well, minus some posts that remain as drafts (some of which will see the light of day and others that won’t for various reasons) I can officially say that I have made 1,000 posts!!! (I say I’ve been dancing around this post because I keep going through the drafts and deleting some or posting them if they’re still relevant).

1000 blog entries in four years. I did almost 400 in the first year, and it’s tapered off since then, but I’m still blogging.

According to my labels the most popular categories are: general updates (168), stuff (97), work (72), gratitude (59) and country music (51). Scrapbooking (38) and Dierks (36) are the next highest. Interesting.

Here’s to another 1000. It will be interesting to see what my biggest categories are in the NEXT four years :)

Word of the Day #39: loquacious

lo⋅qua⋅cious
loh-kwey-shuh s
–adjective
1. talking or tending to talk much or freely; talkative; chattering; babbling; garrulous: a loquacious dinner guest.
2. characterized by excessive talk; wordy: easily the most loquacious play of the season.